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Abby Dates Austin

Abby Dates Austin: You're more available than you think you are

Group date
Untraditional lifestyles doesn't mean you're undateable. Courtesy of Dating 101

When you’re the sort of guy or gal who lives out of his or her suitcase, dating can be the furthest thing from your mind. I ran out of money within two months of relocating to Austin, and have been hopping from couch to couch and working odd jobs ever since. In a constant state of dishevelment, I might be turning heads, but not because I’m an alluring female Bob Dylan facsimile.

After such an extended time of displacement and unpredictability, I have become a bit sterile in my approach to dating. I find myself not caring as much: What if I’m somewhere new tomorrow? Why get attached to someone I might not be with for longer than a few months?

Taking note of my own walls and barriers made me realize that these roadblocks aren’t unique to the misfits or bohemians among us. People from all walks — and in all stages — of life find that their lifestyle (untraditional or not) can stop them from creating the intimate connection they seek in a partner.

But just because you’re a wanderer, just because your feet rarely touch the ground, doesn’t mean you can’t feel rooted. Likewise, just because you work erratic hours, or have a kid or two added into the mix, doesn’t mean you’re off the market. In the same way that I’ve developed deep friendships with fellow wayfarers, I need to seek out romantic partnerships with people that can offer a similar connection. 

We need to realize that our unique circumstances don’t have to dictate our dating lives. If you’re in a place where you feel you’re not “ready” for love, rethink it. Just because it doesn’t look like what it’s “supposed to” doesn’t mean it’s not worth giving it a try ... dishevelment and all.

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