Editor's note: There's so much that's beautiful, funny, smart and informative on the Internet. Problem is, there's also a bunch of garbage. Here's the best of the web right now:
1. Deadspin brings a sleigh full of hate for the 2014 hater's guide to the Williams-Sonoma catalog. Who needs a $60 hot chocolate pot? Or a $90 fake garland wreath? Or to see Ina Garten being all smug? That peppermint bark, though...
2. William and Kate met Beyoncé and Jay Z at the Nets-Cavaliers game in Brooklyn. LeBron James was there too, so if you're keeping score at home, we've got King James, Queen Bey, Prince William, the Duchess of Cambridge and the self-proclaimed God of Rap. Somewhere, an old man is writing a letter to the editor about this.
3. Speaking of England, Radio 4 premieres its radio adaptation of Good Omens on December 22, but they previewed some of the characters this week. If that link is a little too nerdy for you, then you're a cotton-headed ninny muggins. Another smoothless segue approaches!
4. Here are 12 things you might not know about the movie Elf. Uproxx takes a look at the 2003 holiday classic. Bullet point No. 9 is dark.
5. Wired looks at why running hurts every part of your body. It's probably because running is the worst, but at least there are reasons.