Relationship Advice

Pink Kisses answers: "Should I wait for her to get over her ex?"

Ellie Scarborough

Ellie Scarborough and Amy Lynch are two bodacious bombshells locked & loaded with intelligent answers to all your questions about dating, love, sex, breakups and all things in between. Ellie launched a community in 2010 to help girls get through heartbreak, giving them tips, tools and inspiration to keep them moving forward without looking back. Now, she and professional partner-in-crime(s of the heart) Amy are lending their expertise to CultureMap, solving the problems of the 512's lovelorn one no-BS answer at a time.

Q: I’m a girl who’s very much interested in an amazing woman. She’s smart, fun and absolutely beautiful. She was really hurt in her last relationship and I’m giving her time to heal before anything else takes off with us. She knows I’m interested, and she says she is too. And I completely understand that she needs time.

What I want to know is, how do I make sure she knows I’m not like her past relationships... i.e., that I'm faithful and trustworthy? She's an amazing person and I look forward to having a relationship with her, but I don’t want there to be any doubt in her mind when she decides she’s ready.

A: You know what's funny, and actually kind of cute? You're already showing her that you're different from the people who've hurt her in the past. You're respecting her boundaries. You're giving her the time and space she needs to be ready to jump into something new. You're showing that you're a mature, patient, self-actualized person who doesn't just want to be in a relationship with her on your terms; you want her to be as enthralled with it as you are. That's a good sign, and if she's as smart and great as you say she is, she'll see it.

You're wise to realize that rebounds are rarely the real deal; they're generally little more than a reactionary (and usually ill-informed) quick fix for our pain.

You're wise to realize that rebounds are rarely the real deal; they're generally little more than a reactionary (and usually ill-informed) quick fix for our pain. Breakups can make us crazy with anger and frustration; we feel like we've been mortally wounded, and sometimes, we try to stop the bleeding with whatever happens to be nearby... and sadly, whatever happens to be nearby usually ends up getting ruined.

So, kudos to her for realizing you're worth more than a short-term fling in the wake of something painful. And kudos to you, too, for realizing that patience is a virtue, and for knowing that you want to pursue a relationship with her that's based on something honest and real, not just knee-jerk impulsivity and convenience. That bodes well for the both of you, and actually, a lot of people out there could probably learn from the example you're setting.

My advice to you is this: if she's expressed an interest in you but clearly needs more time, keep doing exactly what you're doing. Let her come around when she's good and ready. Quite frankly, the pressure that builds up between now and then might pleasantly surprise you both.

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Shelter to Service

Dripping Springs nonprofit trains service dogs rescued from shelters

Photo courtesy of KVUE

The group estimates that it's gotten more than 1,000 dogs out of the shelter system.

For the past 35 years, a service dog training nonprofit in Dripping Springs has transformed unwanted dogs into essential partners for Texans living with significant challenges.

Sheri Soltes, founder and CEO of Service Dogs, Inc., says the dogs they train help serve people with hearing or mobility disabilities. The canines also comfort those enduring traumatic events.

In a time where most animal shelters in Central Texas are over capacity, Service Dogs, Inc. is handing out second chances to pups with potential to make a difference in people’s lives.

“They're sort of like the cousins to guide dogs,” Soltes said. “Except we're unique because we get our dogs from animal shelters instead of having a breeding program. So we help the dog and we help the person.”

She says the nonprofit can’t adopt every dog because the pups must meet specific qualifications, narrowing down from their age to their temperament.

Soltes says dogs must be at least a year and a half old in order to be X-rayed to assess their health, must be extremely people-oriented and should be comfortable being in public settings.

She says Service Dogs, Inc. may bring back one out of 500 dogs in a shelter.

“We've probably trained well over a 1,000, probably closer to 1,200 dogs by this time over 36 years. Any dog that we adopt from a shelter, if it doesn't complete the training, we don't take it back to the shelter, will find it a good pet home. So, they're going to win either way with us,” Soltes said.

Depending on the pooches’ temperament and personality, they’ll be trained in any and all of four programs available.

Soltes says the nonprofit trains the canines to be hearing dogs that can alert people who are deaf or hard of hearing. They could be trained for people with mobility disabilities, learning to open and close doors or steady someone’s balance.

She says they also train dogs to work in areas devastated by catastrophic storms, in courthouses in the victim's assistance departments or with first responders struggling with their mental health.

“They're not always the right tool for every kind of job, but they're very, very helpful,” she said.

Read the full story and watch the video at KVUE.com.

animals pets disability shelter