T&A Town

Say hello to Bikinis, Texas: Proud "breastaurant" empire expanding into citygovernance

She works hard for the money, so you better treat her right.
Look, a perfect triangle.
CEO Doug Guller (center) gets his Bikinis area covered by his Director ofOperations Chris George and Franchise Sales Operator Kevin Pearson.

Y'all. I don't even know how to write this. My brain and eyes are literally melting right now.

Doug Guller, CEO of ATX Brands, LLC — the company that owns The Parish, Pelóns and Beale Street Tavern — announced Tuesday that he has purchased an abandoned Hill Country town and named it after the company that made him his first million: Bikinis.

Bikinis, Texas, is a real thing. That you will soon be able to visit.

“Bikinis, Texas will be a world-class destination, and I am thrilled to expand the Bikinis brand to include town ownership,” says Guller. “There could not be a better way to put Bikinis on the map…literally.”

The town, an abandoned railroad stop once known as Bankersmith, Texas, is located 10 miles south of Fredericksburg and six miles southwest of Luckenbach, forming an amazingly perfect (bikini) triangle south of Austin. There are currently a lot of trees and hills and that's about it.

Bankersmith went on sale on Craigslist, and the entrepreneurial Guller seized this unique opportunity to become the proud owner of his very own municipality. Which he will promptly turn into a Hill Country party destination. (Where else have the good people of Luckenbach been going for their Tuesday Night Wings-and-Boobs?)

Whatever your moral objections to the Bikinis franchise and its unapologetic perpetuation of the objectification of women as consumable body parts, there is no denying that the rest of the Great State of Texas has embraced Guller's "breastaurant" concept with hungry eyes and bellies.

In five years, the franchise has added nine additional locations throughout Texas, as well as Oklahoma City, OK and Charlotte, NC. And by 2017, Guller expects to have over 50 locations throughout the United States.

Now, the unincorporated City of Bikinis — a literal city of bikinis, y'all — is intended to become a destination spot for annual parties, festivals and events. “Bikinis, Texas will be a world-class destination, and I am thrilled to expand the Bikinis brand to include town ownership,” says Guller. “There could not be a better way to put Bikinis on the map…literally.”

No word yet on who will become the mayor of this proud swimsuit-themed city. Perhaps it will be determined by a wet t-shirt contest? I, for one, cannot contain my excitement to learn of the mayor's political stances and measurements.

All jokes aside, it will be fascinating to see how quickly the straight men of Texas flock to Bikinis once Guller opens the doors. My thoughts and prayers go out to all the bikini-clad women who will be working for amazing tips in this literal land of objectification.

I still can't wrap my mind around it, y'all. This is real life in Texas.

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Self-driving Roller Coaster

More self-driving cars expected to roll out in Austin for 2025

Photo courtesy of Waymo via KVUE

Various brands offering self-driving cars are on-and-off in Austin.

Expect to see more self-driving rideshare vehicles, also known as robotaxis, on Austin roads next year.

Robotaxi company Waymo, which you may have already seen on Austin's roads, is partnering with Uber. At some point next year, customers will be able to use the Uber app to call a self-driving ride.

Austin-based company Avride is in the testing phase and plans to roll out its robotaxis next year.

Currently, Volkswagen ADMT and Amazon's Zoox are in the testing phase in Austin, while Hyundai's Motional is in the mapping phase.

Last year, robotaxi company Cruise paused operations in Austin after the California Department of Motor Vehicles revoked the company's permits to operate driverless vehicles in the state. And last week, General Motors said it would no longer fund the company because of the time and resources needed.

This way of getting around has come with its safety concerns and issues. The city is tracking those concerns. According to the Transportation Department, the problems span from blocking the roads and parking in front of people's homes for weeks with lights beaming through their windows, to actual wrecks.

Since July 2023, robotaxis have been involved in 75 incidents. Only 21 of those incidents happened in 2024. It's important to note that Cruise has not been operating in Austin this year.

Since July 2023, driverless rideshare vehicles have been involved in 22 near collisions, eight collisions and seven instances where driverless taxis ignored directions from the Austin Police Department (APD).

According to the data, at least four of those Austin police incidents happened in recent months. The issues varied from driving through police checkpoints, to malfunctioning and getting stuck at an APD road closure near pedestrians, causing safety concerns.

A Waymo spokesperson said their vehicles have gesture recognition capabilities, which they've been training APD officers on using.

As the report shows, sometimes it does not work and Waymo said it is working to improve that. The spokesperson said that as of just last week, Waymo's First Responder Program has been independently verified by TÜV SÜD, making Waymo the first autonomous vehicle (AV) company to receive third-party validation for our emergency response protocols. They also said the data to date indicates the Waymo Driver is already reducing traffic injuries and fatalities in the places where the company currently operates.

Read the full story and watch the video at KVUE.com.

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