Editor's note: There's so much that's beautiful, funny, smart and informative on the Internet. Problem is, there's also a bunch of garbage. Here's the best of the web right now.
1. The Pentagon has a plan to stop the zombie apocalypse. When the U.S. military says it plans for every possible disaster, it means it. A document titled "CONOP 8888" (aka Counter-Zombie Dominance) details how the military would preserve human life, maintain law and order, and restore basic services "during and after a zombie attack."
2. Cat fights off dog that attacks toddler. Four-year-old Jeremy was riding his bike in his driveway when a dog attacked him. The family cat, Tara, swooped in and ran off the dog. Many people thought the one-minute video was staged, so the family released an unedited version of the surveillance video to quiet the vicious rumors.
3. Honest wedding invitation tells it like it is. Late spring and early summer is prime wedding season, and although the occasion is theoretically about the bride and groom, guests can make or break your big day.
4. How Stephen Sutton charmed Britain. It's not often we jump across the pond for our link roundup, but Stephen Sutton is worth the journey. The 19-year-old raised more than 3 million euros for the Teenage Cancer Trust and created a "weird and wonderful" bucket list before he succumbed to terminal cancer.
5. Mariah Carey debuts funky collaboration with D.C. rapper. Everybody loves a good comeback story, and Mariah Carey has been writing hers for some time. This week, she debuted her new song "You Don't Know What To Do" live on The Today Show. The track is part of Carey's long-awaited album Elusive Chanteuse.
The U.S. military has a contingency plan to survive a zombie attack.
Photo courtesy of Houston Zombie Walk
The U.S. military has a contingency plan to survive a zombie attack.
In a time when true movie stars seem to be going extinct, Timothée Chalamet has emerged as an exception to the rule. Since 2021 he has headlined blockbusters like the two Dune movies and Wonka, and also got nominated for an Oscar for playing Bob Dylan in A Complete Unknown (his second nomination following 2018’s Call Me By Your Name). Now, he’s almost assured to get his third nomination for the stellar new film, Marty Supreme.
Chalamet plays Marty Mauser, a world-class table tennis player living in New York. But reducing Marty to his best skill doesn’t do him justice, as he’s also a motormouth schemer who will do almost anything to achieve his dreams. He doesn’t have any qualms about wooing married women like neighbor Rachel (Odessa A’zion) or actress Kay Stone (Gwyneth Paltrow), or hiding his true ping pong skills to win money in scams with friends like Wally (Tyler the Creator).
Marty is seemingly on the go the entire movie, whether it’s trying to convince Kay’s millionaire husband Milton Rockwell (Kevin O’Leary) to fund his table tennis ambitions; or trying to track down the dog of Ezra (Abel Ferrara), a man he accidentally injures; or trying to avoid the ire of the boss at the shoe store where he works. Just when you think he might slow down, he’s off to the races on another plan or adventure.
Directed by Josh Safdie and written by Safdie and frequent co-writer Ronald Bronstein, the film is an almost continuous blast of pure energy for two and a half hours. So many different things happen over the course of the film that the story defies conventional narratives, and yet the throughline of Marty keeps everything tightly connected. His particular type of brash behavior turns much of the film into a comedy as he does and says things that are both shocking and thrilling.
Another thing that makes the movie sing is the fantastic characterization by Safdie and Bronstein. Almost every person who is given a speaking line in the film has a moment where they pop, which speaks to airtight dialogue that the writers have created. Characters will be introduced and then disappear for long stretches of time, and yet because they make such an impression the first time they’re on screen, it’s easy to pick up their thread right away.
Safdie, as he’s done previously with brother Bennie (Uncut Gems), calls on a host of well-known non-actors or people with interesting faces/vibes to inhabit supporting roles, and to a person they are crucial to the film’s success. O’Leary (of Shark Tank fame), rapper Tyler the Creator, director Ferrara, magician Penn Jillette, and fashion designer Isaac Mizrahi each deliver knockout performances. The relative unknowns who play smaller roles are just as impressive, making each beat of the film feel naturalistic.
Leading the way is the powerhouse performance by Chalamet. For one person to believably play both the famously reserved Dylan and also a firecracker like Marty is astonishing, and this role cements Chalamet’s status as his generation’s movie star. A’zion is a rising star who gets great moments as Marty’s on-again/off-again love interest. Paltrow pops in and out of the film, lighting up the screen every time she appears. Fran Drescher as Marty’s mom and Sandra Bernhard as a neighbor also pay dividends in small roles.
Josh Safdie’s first solo directorial effort is unlike any other movie this year, or maybe even this century. Thanks to its breakneck storytelling, a magnificent performance by Chalamet, and countless intangibles that Safdie employs expertly, the film smacks viewers in the face repeatedly and demands that they come back for more.
