Love Stinks

The singles guide to Valentine's Day: 5 ways to have more fun than those stupid couples

Valentine's Day is an exclusionary holiday, which, frankly, is some crap. I have a date this year — waits for applause — but for many years, I did not. From those cold February days came a distaste for Cupid and Hallmark and an appreciation for the anti-Valentine's Day experience.

And for those of you out there who are spending February 14 alone, take solace in the fact that you will not have to spend money on an expensive dinner or overpriced underwear. No, instead, you get a Saturday where you can do one of two things: feel sorry for yourself or have fun with it.

Fifty Shades of Grey for one, please
The Twilight fan fiction turned bestseller is getting the cinematic treatment with a release on Valentine's Eve, but the real magic will be at the Saturday evening showings. Revel in the complete lack of chemistry between Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson, the fanatical housewives whose husbands never got their knot-tying badge in Boy Scouts, and the faint scent of cat dander. At least the soundtrack is good.

Treat Yo Self
Clothes. Fragrances. Massages. Mimosas. Fine leather goods. Treat Yo Self isn't just a Parks and Recreation joke; it's a way of life. What better way to spend Cupid's Saturday than on yourself? You don't need someone else to buy you a mani-pedi or a deep-tissue massage. Go buy that shirt you've been eyeing and match it with some dope pants. This is all about you, and you deserve to treat yo self.

Get drenched in blood
Not literally, cinematically. Mondo Gallery and Alamo Drafthouse are teaming up for a soundtrack vinyl release party mixed with a special screening of the least Valentinesy movie ever: Cannibal Holocaust. Enjoy blood, gore, brutality and more on the screen as well as a themed, four-course menu (Monkey Brains for dessert, anyone?). The horror begins at 10 pm on Anti-Valentine's Day and tickets cost $50.

Netflix is the friend that never leaves
If you don't feel like leaving the house for a movie (blood or no), Netflix has your back. The streaming service added all 10 seasons of Friends on January 1. So what if you've already seen all the episodes on Nick at Nite and know that "The One With The Secret Closet" was the 14th episode of the eighth season? Get nested with a day's worth of junk food, start from season one, and if you stay committed, you'll be well past the one where Ross and Rachel take a break. See, everyone has rough patches.

Pub golf!
Round up some single friends and do a pub crawl the way it was meant to be done: with a scoring system that encourages drinking a lot. The best part about this is you can play with as few as two people, but a foursome or more is where the party gets going as you chug your way to the lowest round. Plus, friends bring new friends, and with alcohol on your side, you might just end this anti-Valentine's Day a little less single (at least for the night).

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A Towering Task

Famous UT Tower will look new again after years of renovations

Photo courtesy of the University of Texas at Austin

The Tower in its current state.

One of the most famous sights at the University of Texas at Austin, the Tower, is soon undergoing a big renovation. It'll take a few years, estimated through the summer of 2027, but when it comes out the other side it should look like as new as it did in 1937.

The project is called “Our Tower: The Next 100 Years,” and it will start exterior work in November. It is part of a $70 million budget that was improved in August, and it'll include work on the "stone, windows, lighting, clockface, and historic gilding on the facade," according to a press release.

This will mean repainting metal and wood, applying gilding, and reconstructing the east and west entrances, all in their original colors and styles.

Some renovations were announced in 2022, but this announcement gives a more complete look at what will be done — and some of the work is coming as soon as this fall.

A rendering of the Tower after renovations looks the same, but cleaner.Rendering courtesy of the University of Texas at Austin

“The most iconic symbol of The University of Texas, the Tower represents the long-standing tradition of excellence this great University is known for,” said UT System Board of Regents chairman Kevin P. Eltife int the release. “This restoration is one of the board’s top priorities, and we are thrilled the work is getting underway. We want every UT student, faculty and staff member, and alum to have a sense of pride as they walk across the Forty Acres, and especially when they see the Tower restored to its former glory.”

Some of the work is also to improve how the Tower functions, including updating exterior lights to work with LEDs, replacing some roofs, and fixing up windows for better energy efficiency.

A summary by the University of the project's scope so far.Graphic courtesy of the University of Texas at Austin

The project will be led by Robert A.M. Stern Architects LLC (RAMSA), which partially specializes in historic renovations and has worked on other university projects, including at Yale, the University of Portland (in Oregon), Georgetown University (in Washington, D.C.), the University of Connecticut, and other stately buildings.

UT Tower spandrels Someone repaints the cast iron spandrels in 1969. They depict five ancient alphabets: Egyptian hieroglyphics, Phoenician, Hebrew, Greek, and Latin.Photo courtesy of the University of Texas at Austin

The Tower will keep serving its current purposes throughout the process, including as a commemorative surface for burnt orange lighting, although it will be fitted with scaffolding and a decorative covering, along with the main building, which will be covered first in November. The Tower and the main building's south facade will stay uncovered until after commencement in 2025.

“Our Tower was built as a sign of audacity and a young university’s aspirations for excellence. Nearly a century later, we have those same characteristics. The Tower represents what is possible for a world-class university that is committed to creating knowledge and teaching tomorrow’s leaders to change the world,” said UT President Jay Hartzell. “Thanks to the vision and support of our Board of Regents, and the generosity of alumni and friends, we are ready to begin realizing the future for our most important University landmark.”

A 2027 view of the West Entrance.Rendering courtesy of the University of Texas at Austin

Funding doesn't come entirely from the Board of Regents’ budget; it is also from the Available University Fund and individual gifts. The campaign to provide funding is ongoing, led by Marcie and Bob Zlotnik. The amount raised will eventually determine the final scope of the project.

“Bob and I are honored to contribute to such a historic project for the University, which will restore the Tower to its former luster and secure its legacy for future generations of Longhorns,” said Marcie Zlotnik. “The Tower holds such a special place in our hearts, and through the very earliest phase of this effort, we have relished connecting with many of the University’s friends and supporters to reignite our collective love for it.”

More information about the Tower is available at tower.utexas.edu.

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