Not to get all Breakfast Club on your calendar, but it's feeling like all the fun things happening this weekend can be divvied up with the inescapable cliques that defined our high school years. Jocks, geeks, artists and stoners will all be pleased with the offerings they've got available to them once you escape detention.

For those of us who belonged to the brooding artistic clique, this weekend and next mark the largest collective art event in the yearly art calendar of Austin. The East Austin Studio Tour (E.A.S.T.) happens officially and unofficially at a string of galleries and houses and spaces across the East side. Download the map off their site or pick up a snazzy guide at any local public library, or just drive around for a while—you'll probably run into some kind of crazy party somewhere. We can especially recommend the shows happening at Fisterra Studios and Okay Mountain.

If you were more of a performer that loved the spotlight, you'll love the theater offerings happening all weekend. Shrewd Productions opens their epic comedy Big Love at the Long Center for the Performing Arts. This retelling of a classic Greek tale of runaway brides is directed by Austin theater critic Robert Faires and stars an impeccable cast of versatile, capable actors.

Somewhere between Austin and Houston, the really extreme theater kids will want to practice their Olde English for the Texas Renaissance Festival. This anachronistic city unto itself offers all the bawdy entertainment and turkey-legged goodness of your childhood memories. This weekend, the Scottish Queen arrives and the Festival will be occupied by the traditional music and costume of the themed Highland Fling.

If you prefer spandex to tartan plaid, you might try dressing up like Spider-Man and geeking over at Wizard World's Austin Comic Con. Held Friday thru Sunday at the Austin Convention Center, this major geekfest celebrates all the best things that make pop culture a little bit nerdier. Comic book artists, television actors and industry insiders will make up the 300+ celebrities that will whip the geeks in attendance into a frenzy. It'll be almost as fun seeing the costumes as it will be seeing the celebrities like James Marsters, Edward Furlong and Hayden Panettiere.

The Alamo Drafthouse is getting in on the geek love too with some Comic Con-inspired special guests. On Friday night, they're showing the original Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory with four of the five of the original kids from the film. (Augustus couldn't make it due to a holdup in the Chocolate River.) Then, Saturday, vampiric dreamboat James Marsters (Spike from TV's Buffy the Vampire Slayer) drops in for a Vampire Sing-Along of the show's two famous musical episodes.

For the jocks and the do-gooders of us, the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure happens this Sunday morning. Thousands of dollars have already been pledged, and all that's left to do is walk, run or shuffle through the streets of downtown, raising awareness and funds for breast cancer research. It's never too late to join the crusade or to cheer on the folks running in memory of a loved one.

Another great charity event for you Molly Ringwalds out there happens at Barton Creek Mall on Saturday. Canstruction is a national charity event that invites artists to compete in a day-long sculpture-building competition using only donated canned goods as their materials. After the juried event is judged and the structures stay on display for a month, all of the canned goods will be donated to the Capital Area Food Bank of Texas.

Finally, for the cynical rebels that probably spent the majority of their high school years in detention, there are a couple of big comedy shows happening this weekend as well. Nick Thune, who has made a huge name for himself at Funny or Die and in his own web series, does a four-day run at Cap City Comedy Club. And in case you're wondering, Thune has also appeared on The Tonight Show and Comedy Central with his stand-up, so trust that you're in good hands.

Similarly, rising Austin comic (and totally nice guy) Bob Khosravi is also headlining over at The Velveeta Room this weekend. Khosravi is one of Austin's most beloved full-time comics that travels around the country making audiences fall in love with him, and you'll probably do the same. Off-the-wall meta-comic Ryan Cownie opens for him, so it'll be a good show for sure.

These are just a few of the big events that are on our minds for this weekend. Even though we spent years trying to escape the stigma of being the President of the National Honor Society in high school, it's amazing how our adult past times still fall in the parameters of what we loved back then. We just (hopefully) have more money to enjoy our secret inner geek more fully now.

And cue the Simple Minds song to play us into the make-out scene on the football field. And... credits...