It's obviously a terrible idea. But it's also all we want to talk about all day, every day.
Rumors have popped up in Australia that Queensland billionaire mining magnate Clive Palmer is looking in to the possibilities of harvesting dinosaur DNA à la the 1993 Speilberg movie Jurassic Park in order to bring those pea-brained prehistoric monsters back into the present day.
And, because nobody learns anything from horror movies anymore, he apparently would like to set them loose in his luxury resort in Coolum, Australia. (Because it's an island, so what's the worry?)
Thursday, Palmer — who looks eerily similar to Richard Attenborough — told the Gold Coast Bulletin that the rumors are unfounded. However, Mark Furler, the editor of The Sunshine Coast Daily states that, "Mr. Palmer has changed his tune several times on this project" and "a lot of those rumors are coming from Clive's camp."
The specific news from his camp is that Palmer reached out to the Roslin Institute in Scotland, who shocked the world with the first fully cloned sheep, Dolly, in 1996. The Institute told the Herald Sun that resurrecting dinosaurs would be "difficult," primarily because of the trouble finding enough workable DNA samples and finding a suitable surrogate to carry the baby raptors.
Normally we would just go ahead and discount this notion as a crazy person talking their crazy talk to get some national attention. However, Palmer is the man who commissioned the creation of the Titanic II as "a tribute to the spirit of the men and women who constructed the original Titanic."
The first Titanic Culinary Journey set sail on Monday. And despite Palmer's severe disregard for karma's swift retribution, no catastrophic events have occurred.
Hopefully, if this does come true, they'll leave all the lawyer-chomping "meat-a-saurasuses" out of the equation and just leave us with the peaceful vegetarian dinos. Nobody would ever have to die and we could still enjoy all the sweeping orchestrations every time we saw those long necks eating their leaves and sneezing on little girls.
So who even knows what the future holds. We might just get to find out what it was like When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth.