Reader bee ware
Austin-based dating app offers "Ex-boxes" to dump unwanted belongings from past relationships
Bumble, the women-first dating and social networking app, has always been known for its innovative approach to modern human connection. Now, the company is offering a way to, well, disconnect, announcing the opening of new pop-ups around the country to house the unwanted shrapnel of relationships gone bad.
Aptly named ‘Ex-Boxes’, the idea is that Bumble users can drop off their ex’s belongings in preparation for a fresh start this year. And they aren't skimping on size, either: The 5,000 square foot pop-ups will open next month in New York, Austin, and Los Angeles, with plans to expand globally later this year.
While the Ex-Boxes stop just short of accepting your actual Ex at drop-off, a release from the company states they did, in fact, explore this option with their internal legal team. Nonetheless, the pop-ups will happily accept your ex’s clothes, shoes, pictures, love letters, journals, records, furniture, concert ticket stubs, and even unused miles and future dinner reservations.
A Bumble spokesperson stated, “According to our recent survey, 98 precent of respondents say they wish they had a place to get rid of their ex-partners' things and 99 percent said still having some of their ex’s belongings around keeps them from moving on. These pop-ups are a physical embodiment of giving our community the fresh start they need on their dating journey.”
If this sounds too good to be true, that's because it is: The aforementioned release states that this is, in fact, an April Fool's Day announcement. (And reader, it was in very small print at the very bottom of the email: We were fooled ourselves!).
"Although we can’t take everyone’s ex’s things, we do know breakups are an inevitable part of dating," the release states. "Sometimes the hardest part of ending things can be trying to get back to what you consider 'normal' afterward, without thoughts of the person intruding every so often and making you sad all over again. In a recent Bumble survey, 70 percent of people said they feel positive about the romance that lies ahead this year, highlighting their look forward to a fresh start in 2023."
This survey, at least, appears to be legit, compiled from research conducted by Bumble using internal polling between October - November 2022 with a sample of 14,300 global Bumble users.